Eating out with PCA

I found an old post dated 4 July 2010 on my main blog and thought it would be helpful to re-post it here:

Eating out with Mum can be a challenge as her form of dementia (Posterior Cortical Atrophy) means we have to bear a number of things in mind:

-  choose a table away from 'through traffic' as movement within her eye-line can disorientate her;

-  sit in a quiet-ish space;

-  tables narrow enough to lean over and help or someone sits at 90 degrees so it's easier to assist if necessary;

-  choose simple dishes from the menu that are straightforward for her to manage mainly on her own.

Tonight we ate at Ruby's in Bushey Heath.  We've eaten there a number of times before as the menu is reasonably priced with a good variety of tasty, well-proportioned dishes (aka the size that even my Dad can't finish and is therefore impressed!)

Exterior

The service is always good although tonight, they really outdid themselves:

-  they released a table that was technically reserved as it was away from the main walkway; 

-  they laid out the menus before we sat down but not in front of Mum (I had mentioned she had dementia but was really impressed with this as instead of being on autopilot when setting the table, they had clearly thought this through); 

-  extra plates were brought within seconds of being asked so we could organise the food so Mum had less in front of her hence making it easier for her to manage on her own; 

-  when checking how we were doing, staff made sure they directed simple conversation to Mum as well in order to include her wherever possible.

Of course the big thing has nothing to do with the restaurant itself but her fellow diners.  Dad gets tired of having the same conversations over and over again, so to give him a break it's important that one person focuses just on Mum and whatever she wants to talk about (usually topics/people that go waaaay back!!).  

It therefore is becoming increasingly challenging for anyone other than family or long-standing friends to share time with her as whoever is involved in the conversation needs to remember the key subjects and names that she's recalling otherwise the whole thing is very frustrating for her.  I'm happy to take on this role in these situations so all-in-all, the whole evening went off extremely well.

Needless to say, Dad will be going back there again - hopefully with us!